Necronomicon (1993)

Necronomicon (1993) poster
Rating: ★★
H.P. Lovecraft Anthology

Anthology of three H.P. Lovecraft tales from directors Christophe Gans, Brian Yuzna and Shusuke Kaneko. For claiming such a quintessentially Lovecraftian title as this, you feel that it should have been more than it is

Chimera Strain (2018)

Chimera Strain (2018) poster
Rating: ★★
Scientist’s Illicit Genetic Experiments

A film about a scientist trying to perfect a genetic engineering process. This turns into a strange SF reworking of the classic ghost story The Turn of the Screw

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) poster
Rating: ★★
Comic-Book Superhero

One of the more disappointing of the Marvel Comics adaptations. Despite all the elements assembled, this never comes to life in director Joe Johnston’s hands and takes forever to get into action

Underworld: Awakening (2012)

Underworld: Awakening (2012) poster
Rating: ★½
Vampire-Werewolf War

Yet another entry that nobody asked for in a conceptually threadbare series that nobody seems to like … passably better than the last two sequels due to some ok action moves but still empty-headed in terms of ideas

Ice Soldiers (2013)

Ice Soldiers (2013) poster
Rating: ★½
Revived Soviet Super-Soldiers

This Canadian effort about Soviet super-soldiers unfrozen in the present-day feels like one of a bunch of cheap direct-to-video copies of Universal Soldier that came out in the late 1990s. The film generates remarkably little in the way of action of excitement

Vampirella (1996)

Vampirella (1996) poster
Rating:
Comic Book Adaptation/Alien Vampire Heroine

Disappointingly tatty rendering of the famous comic-book strip as a low-budget Roger Corman production. Vampirella is missing her distinctive costume and Talisa Soto comes nowhere near the comic-book character’s statuesque voluptuousness

H.P. Lovecraft’s Cool Air (2006)

H.P. Lovecraft's Cool Air (2006) poster
Rating:
H.P. Lovecraft Adaptation

Low-budget director Albert Pyun, best known for his kickboxing cyborg action films of the 1990s, conducts a micro-budgeted adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft story about a scientist who fends off death by keeping their room chilled

Deus (2022)

Deus (2022) poster
Rating:
Space Expedition Finds Gateway to Heaven

It is hard to find SF films that come with a bigger conceptual grasp. This has distinct overtones of 2001: Space Odyssey and Event Horizon about an expedition to Mars to investigate a mysterious black sphere – only to find that it offers a gateway to Heaven

Sleeping Beauties (2017)

Sleeping Beauties (2017) poster
Rating:
Erotic Fairytale Adaptation

A softcore erotic version of the popular fairytale. Largely the film gets the fairytale over and done with in the first eight minutes and thereafter focuses on the erotic tumblings of Beauty awakened in the present-day

AE: Apocalypse Earth (2013)

AE: Apocalypse Earth (2013) poster
Rating:
The Asylum Mockbuster/Planetary Adventure

Another of The Asylum’s mockbusters, intended to come out the same time as M. Night Shyamalan’s After Earth. This feels like a cheap planetary adventure that recycles Avatar and Planet of the Apes

Encino Man (1992)

Encino Man (1992) poster
Rating:
Revived Caveman/Teen Comedy

An excruciatingly unfunny teen comedy with Brendan Fraser as a caveman who is unfrozen in the present-day. The film served to introduce Fraser and Pauly Shore, one of the most annoying figures to ever appear on screen

Voyage of the Rock Aliens (1984)

Voyage of the Rock Aliens (1984) poster
Rating:
Alien Visitors Musical Comedy

Forgotten 1980s obscurity about aliens come to Earth in search of rock music that feels like someone attempted to conduct a version of Grease for the Star Wars crowd. Filled with utterly excruciating slapstick humour and bland songs from bands that nobody has heard from again

Batman & Robin (1997)

Batman & Robin (1997) poster
Rating:
Comic-Book Superhero

Possibly the worst film ever made on a big studio budget, Joel Schumacher’s follow-up to Tim Buton’s standout Batman films where he turns everything into an absurd Day Glo realm with a script for two year-olds, campy puns and badly overacting super-villains